My daughter is dating a manipulator
"Survivors," Frerichs says, "don't come to you to FIX IT." Listen to her and refrain from judging her. Make her feel comfortable in knowing that she can confide in you when she's ready.
Frerichs says that victims need to share their stories and feel secure in the fact that someone is there to hear them express their emotions.
You then retreat into your own thoughts trying to process the interaction, feeling too insecure to pursue the conversation any further. You've just opened yourself up in a vulnerable way and they've barged into that soft open space with aggression leaving you feeling trampled upon, exposed and unsafe.
If this is their pattern, you may even start to believe you are responsible for their anger.2.
During this time, you may talk to her, privately, about your concerns.
Resist the impulse to interject yourself in her relationship.
Support her in the process of recognizing the realities of the abuse.
Psychotherapist Gudrun Frerichs, writing for the website Self Growth.com, says you should not try to repair the relationship or your daughter.
They Deflect Their Behavior Back To You You're left again, wondering if they're right and doubting your own feeling's validity.
You may suppress your desire for healthy communication because of how exhausting it is to try to communicate.